Paula Levine
David learned he had pancreatic cancer at the beginning of August, just after returning from the burial and Shiva for his beloved nephew Shmully, the son of his sister Leya and her husband, Rabbi Morty Moscowitz, both of whom are here today. David’s diagnosis was a shock, out of the blue. He was healthy, didn’t eat meat, had been an athlete, done AIDS rides, never ate fried food…and never thought he would die. This is a man who got his PhD in his 50’s and returned again to study psychoanalysis in his 60s because he wanted to prepare for his 70’s, 80’s, 90’s and beyond.
Even
with the diagnosis, he was determined to fight like hell and be part of
the small percentage that lived beyond the statistical predictions. You
have to realize that this man was a Taurus—he would not let go. If
there was a wrong done to him that he felt needed righting, or a wrong
in the world he would tenaciously persist to address or correct the
situation. For example, he was responsible for getting Washington Mutual
Bank to return over $8000 to us they levied as a penalty on our
remortgaging the house. An employee gave us the wrong information, that
there would be no penalty, which the bank determined, was incorrect and
levied the penalty as an additional fee. It took about 8 months for
David to climb the corporate ladder email by email, phone call by phone
call, to the highest rungs. Washington Mutual returned every penny.
His
tenacity translated into loyalty to those he loved and those he cared
for. Committed to his work, he continued to see patients and supervisors
through the month following his preliminary diagnosis, weaving in
doctor appointments and tests, as well as emergency runs to the
hospital, between his regular sessions with patients and colleagues.
David
was a brilliant, gentile, kind and generous man who loved nothing more
than listening to people talking about their lives. He became an active
listener, guided by the wisdom of his mentors at the Psychoanalytic
Institute and the writings of many who tempered and shaped his focus and
engagement, to hear the words and affect of others in Bion’s terms
“without memory or desire.” When we spoke, really spoke together, he
always brought me back to my self.
This
is a huge loss--for what he could have done, how he could have and
wanted to help others, how he could have continued to give back to the
world around him. He lived many lives in 70 years. He would have lived
many more.
You
all carry a part of him, and together we make up the complexity and
details of David. We will be putting together a website to collect
stories. I’d like to invite you all to share your memories of his,
exchanges, engagements, moments, and would appreciate it if you could
make sure your email is in the registration book so I can send out the
announcement and url for the site. In addition, we’ll be holding a
celebration of his life, so I’ll forward the information on the
date/time and place once it is confirmed.
Thank you all for being here to honor him.
It
is Elul, the month before the Jewish High Holy days. Yesterday,
David’s cousin Rika from Israel told me that the Sephardic Jews use this
time to begin to prepare for the holidays by blowing the shofar each
morning.
I’d
like to try to do this to crack open the sky a bit (if I can get a
sound out of this) and have the shofar set alight our love of him and
his name.
Seymour Kramer
CHIYA/TORN
WHEN DAVID STARTED WRITING POEMS HE WOULD SEND ME HIS DRAFTS. THEN HE WOULD ENCOURAGE ME TO WATCH HIM READ. SOON HE WOULD FIND MY CRITICISM ENCOURAGING. THEN HE WOULD ENCOURAGE ME TO WRITE FOLLOWED BY ENCOURAGEMENTS TO READ WITH HIM AT OPEN MIKES.
HE WAS AN INCORRIGIBLE ENCOURAGER.
IN THE WEEK SINCE DAVID DIED I HAVE GRASPED AT SHADOWS OF OUR FRIENDSHIP TO ONLY HAVE THEM TEAR THOUGH MY FINGERS JUST AS THEY STARTED TO BRIGHTEN
1.
Its been said of some people
There goes a man of few words
That has never been said of me
I am a man of subordinate clauses
And that is what we need today
A fulsome talker summoning such detail
That Proust would cry uncle
No, much more
A run-on messiah to raise the rest of the dead
An angel of recall
To make even god cry uncle
And return him to us
But I aint no angel
2.
I first met David at the corner of Folsom and 24th street
It was love at first Knicks game
He was an enthusiast
Did you ever see him dance
He moved like Don Quixote
Performing jumping jacks
While gathering home pigeons
On a red hook roof
And over there Sancho Panza
Laughing himself silly
Leaning on the parapet
And when he sang
His favorite song from back then
Image of a girl
By the Safaris
On Eldon records
The rhythm and tune would bend to his approximations
Like baker beach bends to the moon
And what a memory
A wearhouse of wonder
Him wandering from street to cafe seat
In softball cleats and batting gloves
Or riding on a warhorse
Mane flowing then thinning
then clipped
Remembering every friend thinker artist
From Jimmy the Bear to Bion
Anthony Ianonni to Eugene Ionesco
And every joke and I mean every Joke
And every pun that shambled his way
Including some that i lay claim to
Are you a man or a Maoist
He could even tell you what day of the week it was
For every calendar date as far back as you cared to go
He’d remember all the crack-ups on Marty’s mean streets
And we’d laugh
Heh that’s not a German lens that’s a jap adaptor
You mean the Tuesday after the Monday
Does the pope shit in the woods
There’s nothing wrong with me my friend
Thank you very much Natalie
I’d bleat a note from Woody’s woodwin
And we’d crack up
She doesn’t drink coffee
What did you meet for Sanka
You know you two oughta get your story straight
In fact the only flaw in his memory was
He could never remember a slight
3.
David learned how to play with his sister lee
A tisket a tasket
He lined a basket of love with Paula
He was my friend and i can’t replace him
Dr. Wendy Stern, Psychoanalyst
My name is Wendy Stern. I had the privilege of working with David in a number of capacities at the San Francisco Center for Psychoanalysis - beginning years ago when he was a student in the Foundations Program - through his years of training as a psychoanalytic candidate. Many of you might already know that David was “up for graduation” as they say at the Center – which means that he had completed the requirements of our training program - including:
- 4 years of coursework
- a personal psychoanalysis
- and an immersion in the supervised practice of psychoanalysis – that is, seeing his analytic patients at least four times a week for a period of at least two years each while consulting weekly with a Training Analyst for each case.
On top of that, David had met the graduation requirement for annual case write-ups of his clinical work and the writing of an original graduation paper. His paper focuses on the complex concept of idealization, using the study of the uber baseball fan, by way of illustration. (Parenthetically - this combo of baseball and psychoanalysis held great appeal to many faculty members, and David had no problem finding readers for his paper.)
And yet Again, on his part - a lot of work.
And perhaps I should emphasize for those who are not in the mental health field, this work is not REQUIRED work in the sense of obtaining a degree for professional licensure. Clinicians who train to be psychoanalysts are already licensed and have their own private practices. We all do this additional work for different reasons. For David, it was clearly a labor of love. He loved learning, he loved the disciplines of psychology and literature, the written word, the poetry of language, but mainly – he loved his patients and wanted as he frequently said, “to do right by them.” For him this “doing right” included the work of expanding his already keen clinical skills in the realm of crisis intervention to the arena of psychoanalysis – that is the aim of characterological change brought about by the recognition and understanding of unconscious expressions – symptoms, gestures, dreams - that could be experienced and articulated within the context of the analytic relationship. David worked very hard to learn and practice such deep emotional engagement.
For the last two years, David and I met for supervision every Friday around this very time. I don’t think he was ever late – even though he was usually riding his bicycle to get to my office - and he was never unprepared. He arrived with notes in hand, questions and commentaries in mind. One Friday near the beginning of our meetings, he read notes from a session in which he felt he might have missed his patient’s emotional valence. With unusual candor and the courage of someone on a crucial quest, he spoke of his conflict: he wanted to call attention to the defensiveness he heard, but was concerned about hurting his patient’s feelings. As you might imagine, from here we were off and running in the supervision. David bravely brought his own emotional reactions - along with those he observed in his patients - to our task. He was open and non-defensive, and seemed to love the work of sorting out the feelings – his patient’s and his own - in order to “do the right thing” by the people that relied on him for help.
As part of the Center’s procedure in vetting candidates for graduation, all evaluations of coursework and supervisions are reviewed at a final meeting of the Progressions Committee. Because David’s review was slated for next week, I had occasion to read through these materials and was struck by a certain repetition in faculty comments that certainly resonated with my own impressions, so I thought I’d read a few of those comments here:
And I quote: “David’s sense of humor and great enthusiasm for the subject matter made him a pleasure to work with. Along with these traits, his strong empathic capacity and background in the arts, brought a sensitivity to the subject matter that was impressive. I really enjoyed working with him,”
Another stated, “Dr. Frankel made astute, often pithy comments. He brought a unique perspective to the group’s discussions. His sense of humor helped to make the classes enjoyable. “
And another, “Dr. Frankel made original, playful and thoughtful comments that demonstrate an excellent capacity for what is called lateral thinking: that is, the ability to see threads that lie beneath the surface and to expose them with poetic sensibility and humor.”
And again: “ A Wonderful sense of irony and humor, as well as a gentle and sensitive soul, facilitates Dr. Frankel’s clinical writing and activity.”
So – HUMOR, SENSITIVITY and – I would add –a generous devotion to “doing the right thing” by his patients was apparent to colleagues, teachers, supervisors and, I imagine, in a unique and important way - to David’s patients, themselves.
Having the experience of working closely with David, I know I will never forget him.
He was a very gentle, kind man whose sense of humor and caring were ever palpable, and life was richer for knowing him.
Add: when David heard about his diagnosis he was mainly concerned with giving his patients the space to say what they needed to say – without imposing his own needs on the situation.
In a similar loving fashion, his mind went to his sister – how much could a person bear? And to Paula, his wife - he knew that he could go through anything as long as she was with him, but he didn’t want her to have to suffer.
Patrick J. Quinn
Psychiatric Social Worker, Mobile Crisis Treatment Team
City and County of San Francisco
David was a people person, he also was a lover. David loved to talk, to eat, to pun, David loved the Giants and most of all, David loved Paula. David was a glass half full type of guy. When David decided to become a psychoanalyst along with everything else someone asked him if he thought he was still 30. David was always still 30 with the whole rest of his life open in front of him.
At Mobile Crisis, David was the “go to man”. David’s clinical skills and attention to detail set a high standard for us all. In my 40 years in the field, David was the best supervisor I ever had. He truly taught me how to be a clinician. When I came to Mobile Crisis, most of my experience was in program management. David gave me the first and best clinical training. Sometimes it was hard to get him out the door on a call … as I said, David loved to talk but once engage with a client, David focused directly on that individual and gave that person all the time they needed.
We at Mobile Crisis were jealous when David began his transfer from us to the Psychoanalytic Institute. Knowing David and his love to talk and pun, we thought it was going against his nature to enter a practice where you mostly listen and don’t share your personal life but David went against his nature and proceeded because this was important to him and he believed made him a better helping agent to others.
I always referred to David as a Boy Scout … not in the current political context but as someone who was loyal, trustworthy, honest and kind … this is the David who was my colleague and friend and this is how I remember him best.
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